Vir Das has created history becoming the first ever Indian to host the International Emmys in New York. The ceremony concluded a day back, and Vir now took to his social media to share the much anticipated opening monologue of his stint in creating this historic moment.
Here’s the complete monologue “Welcome to the 52nd Annual International Emmy Awards. My name is Vir Das. I'm your host. I'm from Mumbai in India.
It is very good to be here completely legally. I'm not a I'm not a citizen. It's a very quick visit, in and out. I was just here to vote. Before we start the show, I should say this humbly.
I have an Indian accent and that tends to be tough depending on where I'm traveling to for some people. So if there's anything that I say tonight that you do not understand, I want you to feel free to just go to work tomorrow and ask your boss. And if your boss isn't Indian, your boss is boss. Tonight is a celebration of the world. We tell the original diverse international stories that Hollywood remakes into cash cows with Kevin Hart and Liam Neeson.
Some of you could be discovered tonight. This time next year, you could be in an American TV show. Maybe your name is Hatsuko or Sir Kill, but in America you will play Guy, Joe. And if you're Indian, Raj. It's the only name Americans know.
I have been offered doctor Raj, lawyer Raj, banker Raj, engineer Raj. I once got offered a guy from England literally named British Raj. I didn't take the part. I wanna keep my diamonds, but, all the major platforms are here tonight. And, humbly, I think next year, one of you should really broadcast this show.
What do you think? Yeah? Right? Who does Will Smith have to slap tonight for us to get some eyeballs, guys? I'm kidding.
We're foreigners. You can't slap foreigners with anything but sanctions. Sorry, tariffs. Before I go on, a little bit of housekeeping. I've been asked to let you know that should you win an award tonight, you only have 30 seconds on this stage, and that is more than enough time to congratulate the people that you love, if not pleasure them.
But if you come up on this stage, please do not come up on this platform and say anything divisive, offensive, or inflammatory Because this is America and you will be elected. Sorry. Ejected. I'm sorry. Ejected.
I'm sorry. My god. I'm so sorry. Tonight, we pick winners. And America, you have picked your winner.
You have picked someone to lead you, to make all of your decisions and be the most powerful person in the world, and I think you chose well. Yes. He says erratic things, but he's intelligent, successful, and an amazing businessman. Guys, Elon Musk is a legend. Alright?
You think Elon Musk looks at the presidency the same way he looks at Tesla's? Is that, yeah, technically it's self driving but ultimately I have control. I'm just saying keep Elon Musk happy. Alright? He will buy your platform and turn it into a podcast.
Netflix season 2 of baby reindeer will be Joe Rogan literally eating a baby reindeer. But look, elections come and go. Public elections are just tests of your private conviction. Life like the American visa line is long. Just because who you believe in has won or lost doesn't mean that what you believe in is won or lost.
A politician is a gardener, a security guard. They don't they fortify the front of your house. They don't tuck your kids in at night. Tell them stories. Give them wisdom.
Sleep with your wife unless you travel a lot. Look, tonight we celebrate how far you've come. I know what it's like to sit where you sit right now. You know, the first time I came here, I was a nominee. The next time, I won an award.
Now, I'm the host. Next year, I think I would just be the trophy. They will just hand me over to the best actress and she will pretend to be grateful for me like so many women in my life. We are from across the world. What do we have in common?
All of you have dealt with the amazing rejection that it takes to be an artist in the world. We are rejected way more than we are accepted. So tonight tonight, I ask that we accept each other in this room. There's a line from a Hindi movie that I love that says, and that means essentially that to learn to conquer loss is the greatest victory of all, and that is you tonight. The guy who says that in the movie goes on to brutally murder 4 people, and that could be you later tonight at the after party.
I only ask that you murder within your category. But tonight, whether you win or lose, we are all the same. Guys, in 72 hours, we will all meet together at the security line at JFK headed home where some angry TSA agent will assume we don't speak English and yell at us to take our shoes off, and at that moment, if you have an international Emmy in your hand, which is a very sharp object and and you look like me, enjoy the 2 hour cavity search that follows. But for now, I ask you to raise your glasses raise your glasses for me. Here is to you, you winners, you buzzy girls.
Congratulations. See you at JFK.
Also Read : Vir Das returns to Netflix with a joyful comedy special celebrating kindness
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